Don’t go to ‘College’

For a movie that claims to be the next “Animal House,” “College” truly falls short of every imaginable expectation. Between its lack of plot, substance and overdone acting, this is really the movie to skip. Of the entire cast, perhaps the only big name—and this is a term used loosely–Drake Bell, who plays Kevin in the movie, is best known for his role in the TV series “Drake and Josh.” This B-List cast list really brings to mind an older movie that couldn’t be more appropriate: please, “Not Another Teen Movie.”

Going into this movie, expectations were low; it wasn’t going to be a work of art, but who could have thought it would be this bad. “College” centers around three high school seniors on a college visit—interestingly enough, this really is as close as the producers get to a believable scenario. Filled with attempts at raunch of “Superbad” proportions, this really was a hit and a miss. This movie truly has all the makings for a decent, though oddly typical movie about college, filled with frat initiations, drunken stupors and of course, the skinny, fat and geeky high school seniors, who somehow became friends and are now at the mercy of rather merciless frat members. Why then does it end up failing so gravely? The blame really doesn’t stand on the shoulders of the lackluster cast—though the film’s ultimate demise can be attributed to them—but rather the tried and true plot, only this time it just wasn’t so true.

For starters, it seemed rather appropriate that a movie called “College” spends much of its early scenes in a high school, transitioning from the desire these three teens share to leave their hometown, to a college experience they really weren’t anticipating. But I was, and so was everyone else who bothered to waste the time.

This film really puts to shame the reality of actual college life, not because of its humor but really because of its lack thereof. There was no humor and for that I pity the actors, directors and the writers who seem to lack comedy experience—but what I really pity are those who didn’t wait to read this review, and instead wasted $4.6 million on tickets.